Learning to focus

I think many people would be surprised to know who unfocused I really am. Oh, I walk a good line and can fake it with the best of them. But, deep down I procrastinate everything and when it comes to it, just plain can't focus when I need to. It's like a dirty little secret to keep hidden from the world.

Because of this, I have spent countless hours pouring over self-help, spirituality, meditation, visualization, concentration, study skills, books, websites, practices, CDs, DVDs, anything to help me learn to focus. Nothing's worked. Maybe it's my method, maybe it's my subpar study skills (don't laugh, I may earn high grades but that's just b/c I learn to "speak" the individual language of my instructors fairly quickly, not because I have some study super powers. For whatever reason, I never gained the ability to focus for long periods of time on anything.

Or so I thought.....Apparently, according to those who know me well, I am incredibly focused when I want to be. I have to be interested in my topic (which is why I dropped Eng 101 3 or 4 times before I finally just finished the class) or somehow be personally invested in the outcome. Sorry to say, grades are not enough to make me put forth more than the minimal effort.

Now I know that I need to either be interested in a topic or have a personal gain in order to be willing to expend the effort and focus on it. So I am resorting to the ages-old parenting trick---bribery. Yup, I will bribe myself to focus on things I don't like in order to learn this invaluable skill.

The concept of rewarding oneself is not unheard of. Many motivational texts and self-help resources recommend rewards as a matter of course, whether it's for keeping a positive self-image, taking better care of oneself, or building a successful...whatever. We thrive on rewards. Having a goal seems to make the labor to get there bearable. So why not take that principle and apply it to focus?

I will still use other tools to help practice and hone this skill. A varied tool box is a valuable asset in almost any endeavor. My hope is that focusing becomes less of a struggle (making rewards less necessary) as time goes on. We'll see how well this works.